


Solitary

by chrystening



Category: Castlevania (Cartoon), 悪魔城ドラキュラ | Castlevania Series
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, becomes a bit light hearted near the end, but not really, end of season 2 spoilers, fear of loneliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-10-14 10:47:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17507156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chrystening/pseuds/chrystening
Summary: He’s lonely. Alucard’s alone,you realized.Someone must remain with him. If only to wipe his tears.Alucard / Male Reader.





	Solitary

It was after the final battle with Dracula that you saw Alucard trembling at the bottom of the stairs. His blemishless face was as still as stone, but his hands shuddered.

You thought about what must’ve been racing through his mind. The death of his father, the fact that it was he who had killed him, the _last_ of his family, the reality that it was all over now–

He looked at you in surprise, before his gaze fell down to your hand squeezing his shoulder.

Under your anchoring hand, he stilled. Your heart skittered at the appreciative smile curling his lips. There was a silent thanks, reassurance in the air, but the look in his eyes was anything but consoled. It was so melancholic, so pensive.

As soon as you had seen it, it was gone. Alucard continued walking forward into the light of the gaping castle doors.

You watched the light cast his back in shadow. _He’ll be alright_ , you said to yourself.

You looked at Sypha, who glanced to you optimistically. _Alucard will be alright,_ her look said _._

You smiled back uneasily. _Alucard… Alucard will be alright,_ you settled.

That’s why despite the lingering feeling of _wrong_ you felt, you readied to depart the castle. Sypha and Trevor clearly wanted to continue their adventurous lives, notably with each other. Alucard wanted to remain in his parents’ castle and the Belmont hold Trevor bestowed him.

Your heart pinched. No one… no one had asked you to accompany them. No one had asked you what you had wanted to do.

Probably because they could tell you didn’t _know_ what you wanted to do. Not patient enough for the delicacies of science, not gifted in magic, not particularly ambitious. You wondered if there was _truly_ a place for you in the world, after you left this vampire tomb. You had only found purpose, direction, when stumbling into the vampire-hunting party of three. The camaraderie, the warmth of trusting and being trusted–it was with people you flourished... You looked at your friends sitting beside you, your eyes lingering on Sypha’s thin arm looped around Trevor’s.

… but you refused to linger where you didn’t belong.

You’d travel with Trevor and Sypha until they hit town, where they’d drop you off and you’d just… you’d just figure out what you wanted to do with the rest of your life.

The wagon slowed trotted along. You turned around.

Alucard stared hollowly at its retreating silhouette, a farewell of a smile on his face. It may have been enough to fool Sypha and Trevor, who were too enamored with each other and their future. But it wasn’t enough to fool you.

Your own smile fell once Alucard turned away. His platinum hair turned into a miragelike curtain of shifting, moving light as the sun refracted off of it. In the distance was the dark, jagged silhouette of the castle, a foreboding image in the skyline. It was so mournful.

You felt a pull in your chest, and not for the first time. As Alucard’s figure grew smaller and smaller, until it finally disappeared, you battled against it. He didn’t need you–he didn’t _want_ you, your mind antagonized. But in the end, your feet were landing on the ground, your cloak fluttering down from your descent.

“Whoa!” Trevor exclaimed, pulling on the reins of the horses.

“Where are you going?” Sypha asked, a quizzical look on her face.

“I forgot something,” you lied, grinning your reckless grin to show her all was well. “Go on without me, you two!”

They were clearly about to inquire more, but you were already turning on your heels. You waved erratically, wishing them the best as your legs propelled you forward.

 

You passed under the threshold of the castle gates, and an atmosphere of eerie solitude blanketed you. You frowned, pulling your hood closer.

You treaded carefully through the castle, as quietly as you could. It was a vain effort. You always walked around with a dumb, heavy amble. Your steps echoed as you glided your hands over the dark wood of the palace stair’s bannister.

“Alucard?” you said aloud. Your own voice bounded off the walls and back at you. You sounded so dumb, it was then you kind of understood just why Alucard took to teasing you so much. _A much-too-kind simpleton, but still a simpleton,_ he always said.

There was no response.

You continued your traipse up the stairway, your cloak trailing after you.

With each silent pad up the stairs, you grew increasingly aware of how… somber the castle was. It wasn’t even just the fact that it was now in ruins. It was too large, too encompassing. It felt too big to be comfortable in, not _alone_ , definitely not. Your skin crawled with the deafening silence of the castle.

You quickly ushered yourself out of the grand foyer, and into one of the corridors.

“Hello?” you called out. “Alucard?” The playful grin on your face was slowly diminishing. Surely he must’ve heard you by now. Your mind trailed back to all the times he had managed to sneak up on you. Never had it been the other way around.

You jumped when something cracked under your feet. You looked down and saw a glass under your boot. It was a framed portrait, that must’ve been knocked from the walls in the midst of the siege on Dracula’s castles. You looked at the image underneath the splintered glass. It was a picture of a child, its face cherubic and rosy, the gentlest of platinum curls in a whisp on its head. You knew who it was instantly.

You grinned at it not just because it was a cute picture, but because it reminded you that even moody dhampirs such as this one had childhoods.

You continued wandering the hall, about to call to your friend once again, but you heard what must’ve been… a _snivel_ fall out of an open door. But it couldn’t have been, right? You took another step forward. You must’ve misheard.

Then there was another, followed by a sob. You froze at the pitiful sound, almost in disbelief. Your keen ears picked up the rustle of clothing and a sniffle before he lost his composure again. You couldn’t describe it as anything but choked, wounded weeping. Your heart settled in the pit of your stomach at the sound. It was wrong, _so wrong_.

You stepped into the doorway, a hand against the wall. Your chest tightened with panic at the sight of Alucard with his head in his hands. His tears were like crystal, running down his cheeks seamlessly one after another. Alucard had always emitted this ethereal otherworldliness, the marker that proved his vampire heritage. You looked at his dripping nose, the flush under his skin, the misery in his wet eyes. He had never looked this human before.

“Alucard?” you said lowly.

His head rose, his eyes widened in surprise. At seeing you, he couldn’t help his sobbing, but his hands began to swipe at his porcelain face to hide his shame. You strode over to him quickly, your hands outstretched weakly until they found and curled around the hands that pawed at his face. Your mouth went dry as he tried to feebly push you away.

“Alucard, Alucard,” you whispered. You had a big mouth, he had told you so, but It didn’t feel right to speak loudly. Your whispering, as soft and gentle as you could make it, failed to calm him. He continued to hiccup, gasping for air. Alucard tried to turn his face away from you, probably embarrassed you had caught him like this. You wiped away his tears with your thumbs, bringing his trembling, cold hands from his face.

You wrapped your gloved fingers around his clawed digits. A bold move, you were surprised with even yourself. You hoped he wouldn’t mind.

“Alucard,” you breathed. “What’s wrong?”

Alucard’s molten gaze didn’t rise to meet your concerned one as he struggled to catch his breath. He exhaled shaky breaths, until he closed his eyes to compose himself. You waited patiently, ignoring the burn of your leg muscles. You squeezed his hands in sympathy, reassuring him you were here. _I’m not going anywhere._ As if he had heard your thoughts, his eyes rose.

They were so somber you were at a loss for words. _Never_ had you seen Alucard so... vulnerable. The dhampir basically prided himself on putting on a cold front, a icy facade that appeared to melt for only seconds at a time.

He looked to you, debating silently, before he spoke. He smiled grimly, as if laughing at himself.

“I suppose… I suppose I’m afraid.” Your eyes implored for an elaboration, your expression receptive. “Afraid of being here. _Alone_ ,” he said, the weight of melancholia in his voice.

A tear began to bead at the corner of his misty eyes, edged with red.

You looked at him in surprise, and the mysticality of Alucard’s being dissipated before your eyes.

 _He’s lonely,_ you realized. _Alucard’s alone._

At your shocked expression, Alucard looked away. You berated yourself–of course he was lonely, surrounded by the shambles of his birth home, haunted by the ghost of his parents.

His mouth opened to speak, but nothing came out. His jaw tensed, and you could see him begin steeling himself, trying to cover up the rare second of vulnerability he had allowed you.

You refused to let him do so. You wrapped your arms around him, willing him mentally to just _let go_. You thought vehemently how it was fine to be vulnerable, to be hurt, to be afraid. But you didn’t know how to say it, not without sounding dumb and preachy, which he often proclaimed was one of your worst qualities.

Alucard’s chest heaved with the effort of suppressing his emotions, but he couldn’t muffle the sobs or keep the occasional tear from wetting the fabric of your hood. You almost flinched when you felt his hand tentatively rest on your back. You were downright shocked when you felt his head nest on your shoulder, his hair tickling your skin.

You stayed like that for God knows how long. You listened to his gasps, his whimpers. You didn’t pet or stroke his back in the embrace, only squeezing tighter. The guy was so hard to read–who knew what he’d view as comfort and what he’d view as patronizing.

The sunset lengthened, the room bathed in saturated orange.

At some point, Alucard awkwardly took his hand away from your back, his head rising from your shoulder. You had the wisdom to relinquish him, no matter how much you ached to remain.

You looked at him, and he looked at you. He appeared recovered, as unperturbed as he had looked to you all the time. But under the intense sunlight, if you squinted, you saw pink dusting his pale cheekbones, the pale, elegant eyebrows furrowed cutely. The sight was stunning.

You hadn’t known how appraising your look had become, and subsequently Alucard had to turn away, awkward.

“... Thank you,” you heard. It snapped you out of your spell. Alucard kneeled next to scattered debris. How long would he be picking up the pieces of the battle, you wondered.

You watched him crouch and pick the glass off the floor. Your fingernails dug into your palms. You had come to a conclusion.

“I’ll stay,” you said, much more abrupt than intended.

Alucard paused in his tidying, a shard of glass in his tapered fingers.

“I’ll stay with you,” you said again, growing suddenly bashful at his silence.

He turned and looked at you incredulously, before pulling back his expression to composure.

“You don’t... have to do that,” he said quietly. You smiled mirthfully. He wasn’t saying you _couldn’t_ stay, and you’d be damned if you had heard anything but tentative hope in his voice.

“Of course. I don’t _have_ to do anything,” you agreed. “I just _want_ to.”

Alucard’s eyebrows knotted, but not in his familiar suspicion, unamusement, or frustration. He was trying to figure something out. Was he allowed to have this?

“I… couldn’t make you do that.”

You raised your eyebrows.

“No one can make me do anything.” He didn’t respond, still guilt plaguing his features.

You scoffed at the look on his face. You walked right up to him, eye to eye, hands on your hips.

“Well, would you believe me if I said I had nothing else to do?” you said, the grin on your face telling him immediately you were being cheeky.

At your words, Alucard seemed to relax, the tension in his shoulders gone. He looked at you with an incredulous quirk of his lips. As if frozen in time, you both stared at the other. You were fine with the moment, when something flitted across Alucard’s face. You looked at him in question when he placed a hand on his shoulder. His eyebrows knitted, the pink above his cheeks returning, to your delight.

He was growing closer, you realized dumbly. You didn’t stop him, you didn’t dare to.

The kiss was something strange. As soon as your lips had met, you sprung back. There was a ghost of a tingle on your lips. Alucard’s face was openly downcast, before refining into a tight, emotionless expression of poise.

“I–I’m sorry,” he said. “I thought–”

You didn’t let him finish as you dove for his lips, hands grasping his waist, managing to surprise him for once. His lips were soft and pliable in his shock, before he registered what was going on. He fell into the kiss seamlessly, his hands coming around your body.

It was paradoxically energizing and calming, chaste and alluring, long and short.

When you had run out of air, you withdrew with a long gasp. You blinked at him rapidly, mouth gaping open and closed, trying to find something to say.

“I–well, you thought right,” you blurted, words in a tumble.

Alucard looked at you in suspended awe, before his lips quirked in amusement.

You continued gawking at him, too enamored to be conscious at how stupid you probably looked. You backed a step away from him, feeling too clumsy to be comfortably by his side.

“I… you’re not alone,” you articulated, warm in the cheeks. “At least, you won’t be.” You offered a smile to him.

Alucard was thoughtful.

“... I know,” he said, grateful.

You grinned, happy it was settled. You crouched to pick up the fallen glass still on the floor.

“I might be irritating and idiotic, but I’ve been told I’m a _dear_ to have around,” you purred.

“You’re neither of those things.” Your eyes looked up. Had Alucard just complimented you? Seeing the realization burgeon on your face, his kind face recaptured the faux pretention that was so familiar to you by now. “At least, not intolerably so.” Your face was split by your growing smile.

He sighed as if he were fatigued. “I take it back.”

You cooed, to his dismay, and you two bantered back and forth. The conversation kept going, that room in the castle alive with Alucard’s dry humor and your charm, until the sun finally sank behind the horizon, its light disappearing until just the shock of peach and fuchsia ripped across the darkening dusk sky.


End file.
